Thursday, November 3, 2011

Advice from A Friend

This Post should really be titled, "Be Careful What You Post on my Facebook, it Just might End Up a Blog"

I was so thrilled as I was writing "Devotions For the First Few Days" with all of the Mommy advice I recieved to include in the final chapter.  I had one friend however who went above and beyond just the normal advice.  It wouldn't have all fit in the book, so I wanted to share everything here, because this is some of the best "Mommy Advice" I've ever read.

Unfortunately before I had my first baby, I hadn't seen a lot of other mother's my age in action.  Becky was one of the few women my age with little ones I'd come into contact with.  As I was expecting my first I would watch her like a hawk as she'd interact with her girls.

Her family has been such a blessing to mine, and I'm happy to share her advice with you all.  I just took everything from a Facebook message she sent me. (With her permission of course)

1. Good Moms have sticky floors, dirty ovens and happy kids. Not my original thought, but true. The kids aren't going to remember whether you had a spotless kitchen or manicured lawn. They remember that you spent time with them. They will remember the stupid little stories that you read to them over and over and over....
2. On that note, when they are old enough and I mean old enough to walk, teach them to work. Give them jobs. It may be something stupid, like push in the chairs after dinner or wash the walls (with a damp rag only) but they will learn to work. They will begin to ask you if they can help. Let them. (obviously not if a stove/oven/knife is involved)

3. Hug them, hug them, hug them, hug them. Kiss them, tell them all the time that you love them.

4. I do have to disagree with some that you can hold a baby too much. Sorry. But i mean if nothing else is wrong (they are clean,fed, not tired, nothing physically wrong) they are ok, they just want your attention. And as long as you are giving them ample attention otherwise, don't be afraid to let them "cry it out" or whatever. Many a baby has been spoiled this way because nobody could stand to hear him cry and is now a toddler/preschool constantly on mom's hip or tugging at her dress.

5.I don't believe in colic. it's A. Gas. It can be burped out. You can use a dropperful of aloe vera juice or Gentle Naturals and you won't be giving your baby any nasty unnecessary chemicals. B.Something is physically out of alignment. When babies are born, their bodies have to squeeze through a little hole. Then they don't always settle back right. A good chiropractor can take care of this. C. There is another physical problem. For instance, Ivy's hip issues.

My favorite-
6. Mothering is Ministry.My children are my ministry. I am a pastor's wife. After my husband, my children come first. ( Now,that does not give you license to drop the kids off with the sitter all the time. Once a week for date night, ok, but seriously people. Grocery store, errands, come on. Bring your kids with you. If possible let your kids minister with you. But don't overdo it. I've seen pastor's kids cry, just because they want to be home because they haven't left the church for a week except to sleep and eat.

7. Let your kids know that you read your Bible every day. If you can, do your devotions when they are up (and otherwise preoccupied) If not, then at least let it come up in conversation. Read the Bible with them. Sing hymns to them. Play Christian music. When they do wrong, point them to Scripture. ( for instance, Ps 13:5 i believe says, A righteous man hateth lying) When they do right, praise them. Kindly encourage them to do right. Teach them early to sit quietly in church. (maybe not for the whole service at first,or even for the first few years, but just get them used to being in church)
8. Thank God for your children. Everyday. I mean it. It took me losing a child to be really thankful for my other two.

9. Pray for your children. Not just "Please Lord, help them to behave today". But Lord, please give my children servants hearts. Please help my children to have a love for Your Word. Please help my girl to become godly ladies.

10. Teach your children to pray. It's okay if they pray for Pooh and their dollies at first. Those things are on their hearts, so when they are old enough they won't be afraid to share bigger things with God.
11. Pray for God to develop those things in you. Pray for wisdom. Pray that God would turn your heart towards your children. There is a wonderful book called "Keeping our Children's Hearts" by Steve and Teri Maxwell of It talks about keeping your children's hearts when they are young, constantly working on heart issues, turning their hearts toward God, that way when they are "out on their own" they won't turn away.

Now down to my favorite verses

Proverbs 3:5-6- especially verse 6. " In ALL thy ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct thy paths." That takes us back to verse 5, in that we have to trust Him first in order to be able to do that.

Isaiah 26:3-4- Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on Thee: because he trusteth in Thee. Trustye in the LORD for ever: for in the LORD JEHOVAH is everlasting strength.

Lastly, no matter what anybody else says, me included, you are the mom. You decide what it best. Don't be afraid to question doctors. Don't be afraid to google. Don't be afraid to not listen to Aunt Bertha's advice (or even your own mom sometimes. Although i'd trust my mom over anybody anyday) Stick to your guns. Especially if it's a matter of principle or health.

p.s. there is a story called "I'm Invisible". Google it, read it, and remember that you are building cathedrals. Even the most minute detail, God Sees.

If this advice was a blessing to you, you'll find more like it in my free ebook "Devotions for the First Few Days"  Click on the Link for instructions to download your free copy.


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